Life’s Curveball

Well, this was unexpected. 

You may have noticed I’ve been pretty absent from social media since the New Year or maybe you haven’t (I’m not offended). I wish I could say I decided to do a social media cleanse so I could fully experience life in the moment. 

The reality is that I’ve been sick. Really sick. I thought it was pneumonia but at the end of February I found myself in the emergency room because I couldn’t breathe. One ultrasound and CT scan later and the doctors and nurses couldn’t believe I’d walked in by myself- I was literally suffocating with a fully collapsed right lung and liters of fluid filling my chest. 

Oh yeah, and CANCER. 

I was diagnosed with primary mediastinal large b cell lymphoma. I went into the hospital on February 27th and didn’t leave until March 21st. 

I started chemotherapy. 

I medically induced menopause. 

I lost 30 pounds and my hair. 

I moved from Montana to Colorado. 

It’s a long story. 

At first I felt like a failure. I started my holistic health journey after losing my dad to cancer. I was determined to live a life that would protect me from that kind of suffering. But here I am. 

The truth is that I had no control (that I’m aware of) over how I got this disease. Was it chemical exposure? Pollutants? Birth control? A virus? A vaccine? A random stroke of bad luck? I may never know. 

But I DO know that the healthy habits I cultivated over the past eight years have made me resilient and my body strong. Considering the condition I entered the hospital, I should be a lot worse off. Lucky for me, I’m stubborn and a fighter. 

My disease is aggressive but also treatable. So here I am, surrendering to the western medical system because I literally had no choice. 

Not surprisingly, my platform will be changing. For the time being, I will be sharing about my experience with treatment and how I’m supporting my body holistically in between. I hope you stick around but if this kind of content isn’t for you, I get it. 

If you want more details about what I’ve been going through, check out the blog posts below. These first few blogs serve mostly as a record of what I’ve experienced since diagnosis but I will continue to share about my journey, my mental state, what I’m doing to support my body holistically, and whatever else comes up along the way. 

XO,
Caitlin

A heart-shaped rock Jordan found while I was in the hospital